Bittersweet Goodbye

It’s been a long time coming, friends. This year has been the absolute best of my life. I never could have imagined I’d find so much joy, and peace, in giving God everything. My heart, so prone to want control, finally realized that there is beauty in the unknown. I don’t need to always know how everything is going to turn out, I just need to trust that in following God’s lead, it’ll be worth it. So that’s what I’m doing. With much prayer, I’ve decided to get rid of all social media. Very few people knew this was going to happen, so I know many of you were surprised and curious. My most asked question has been, “Why would you walk away from something that has been successful? Doesn’t success mean God wants this for you?”

I’ll be honest with you, when I first began to seek God about social media, I assumed He would lead me to be much more intentional with my posts…pointing to Him and His word as often as I could. Surely He knows how hard I worked to generate consistent income! Surely He sees how many ladies have been blessed by the honesty and encouragement I poured my heart and soul into each day! But that wasn’t His plan. The more I sought God, the more I knew it was time to let go.

Social media has done me more harm than good. It’s often insatiable, vicious, and dangerous to my ever-wandering heart. It too easily can cause envy, jealously, and discontent in my life. Can you relate? With this highlight reel the world has created, many of us have been found fighting so hard to keep up. To keep up with the other moms, wives, fashion, home decor…the list goes on. Seldom have I scrolled through the app and didn’t leave feeling a bit less enthusiastic about my life. How sad!

A couple questions I often asked myself this year was this: How can I best glorify God in my life? Do my decisions support, and align with what He has for me?

God is teaching me to keep my eyes in my own lane. I’m learning the importance of focusing on what God has for ME, rather than getting caught up in what everyone else is up to. Sometimes when God calls for change in your life, it takes ridding yourself of something all together! And you know what, I’m ok with that. I call it sweet surrender. And let me tell you, there’s no one more worthy of this action than my Savior. When it comes down to it, it’s such a small sacrifice in comparison to Jesus laying down his very life for me!

So back to your question. Why walk away from something that has encouraged others, and has even been successful? Because my life isn’t my own. I lay my rights, my dreams, my wants, my needs at His feet, trusting that what He has for me, will far surpass anything I could have planned for myself. And to me, making God’s name known is far more beautiful than making a name for myself. Although social media provided me a platform, it doesn’t mean that’s the platform God wants me to pursue.

If you stop and think about it, we ALL have a platform. We’ve all been given influence over others. Don’t your friends seek your counsel from time to time? Don’t your children look to you for guidance? Those are just two examples of your God-given platform! So for me, I decided I wanted to being the best influence to my precious family, above anyone else.

If I could encourage you with something, it would be this: Good isn’t always best. Often times we find ourselves busy with good things, but it doesn’t mean it’s the best use of our time. Learn to seek God in everything! He will always make it clear where He wants you, and what is best for you. Press in.

So what’s my plan? Really it’s simple. Jesus. With every breath, with every action, in my day to day, I want to position myself to serve God beautifully. And as much as possible, without distraction.

God has been growing me so much a both a wife and momma this year. I plan to joyfully invest into my family, giving them something I often couldn’t give them before: my undivided attention.

It’s bittersweet to say goodbye. So many of you have said that I’ve encouraged and blessed you, but you have done the same for me! Your thoughtfulness, your kindness, your joy, it meant the world to me!

I’ll still be using my blog from time to time, so please feel free to comment on here and follow along! I’d love to keep in touch still.

Wherever you may be in life, know that God’s ways are always higher. You can trust Him. And you will always find peace in the unknown with God, because even when we can’t see the full picture, He does. And let me tell you, when you let God have full control, your story undoubtedly will be something beautiful!

God is moving me from distraction to diligence, and I am joyfully resting in God’s purpose for my life.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders, and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” Hebrews 12:1-3

Xoxo, Tay